I’m a praying person and America’s social climate is a continuous test of my faith.

As a black woman, hate and racism have always been visible. However, it’s really rather soul-crushing to realize how many people are willfully misunderstanding the displays of desperation, anger, and pain. It’s mind boggling that so many are speaking out about loss of property and have naught to say about murder or abuse of power. It’s strange and insane that white displays of rebellion and revolution, so well detailed in our American history books, are regarded as brave and necessary. But the pleas from Black Americans, to be respected as human beings and the demonstrations that accompany them are regarded as violent, unnecessary, and purposeless.

I have friends with children – babies and toddlers. They’re all newer parents, their little ones being under five years of age. Still nursing, still learning to walk, just learning to use the potty – they’re bright, beautiful balls of life, energy, and love.

“How do I tell my child that the world doesn’t want them?” I don’t think any of my non-black friends have ever had to even dream of having this conversation with their children. But this is literally what a friend voiced to me a couple of days ago.

I don’t think it’s understood that black people are currently in a position where we have to choose between our health, because we’re in the midst of a global pandemic, and our rights as human beings – which by extension is a fight for our lives. If no one protests, if no one demonstrates, if no one makes the world uncomfortable, black deaths will continue to be swept under the rug.

Since the days of Myspace, social media has been a common mental escape. We don’t even have that. Everyday, we open an app and we’re presented with a new death or a new injustice. There’s no escape for us.

“A civilization which leaves so large a number of its participants unsatisfied and drives them into revolt neither has nor deserves the prospect of a lasting existence” – Sigmund Freud

So I have faith in the fires.

Cover Photo created by Shirien Damra